motivation letter

[andeeey]

hey guys, it was my task to write a motivation letter and to describe in it why i chose this study etc. (im already in!). i would really appreciate it, if someone could correct it:

Motivation letter

My name is ****** and I was born in Russia.
Currently I am living in Minster, Germany. Here i had visited the ****** grammar school, covering the 5th to the 12th class. In that time i have already realized my deep interest in the complex structures of companies, the way they work and in which markets they operate. Especially
the subject of marketing turned out to be very interesting for me and thats why I have made a skilled work about that topic in the 12th class.
After I had finished school, I have also completed a Voluntary Year of Social Service in a private clinic and by my own request I could assist there in the management, so I was able to get to know the workflows and duties of this institution, what I have really liked.
Further I am greatly interested in different nations and cultures. This may come from my own multicultural background. Since i was born in Russia and moved to Germany when i was 4 years old, I have learned a lot about both cultures, because on the one hand my parents have provided me the Russian culture and on the other hand I have learned the German culture through friends and by living in this country. The more varieties I have recognized in the two cultures the more absorbing they were for me. Furthermore I really like the fact to study in English, because nowadays it is essential to be proficient in English, if you want to become someone in the global business environment.
That is why i have made the decision to study International Business. That will give me the possibility to learn all the things about economy and management and simultaneously I will become acqainted with different cultures and I will be prepared to work in foreign countries, where I can experience those civilizations.
I Have chosen the Saxion University, because I admire the actuality, that the classes in Saxion are very small, so that the teacher is able to attend to every single student.
Beside I like the project we have to deal with as we come in contact with other students and exercise ourselves in teamwork in which I am unpracticed yet.
Since the studies began, I am working hard to reach my determinated aims. At least I am spending two hours a day for them, because I know of the importance of beeing ambitious and discplined.
In the future I would like to work in an advertising agency or maybe set up my own one.

Yours faithfully,
******

[Keswick]

Bitte keine Anfragen per PN nach dem Motto "Bitte kannst du mal meinen Beitrag hier ansehen", Andeeey. Ich bin oft genug hier um zu sehen, wenn ein neuer Beitrag gepostet wurde.

Hey guys, it was my task to write a motivation letter and to describe in it why I chose this study etc. (I'm already studying it!). I would really appreciate it, if someone could correct it:

Motivation letter

My name is ****** and I was born in Russia.
Currently I am living in Minster, Germany. Here i had visited (better: attended) the ****** grammar school, covering grades 5 to 12. During that time I already realized my deep interest in the complex structures of companies, the way they work and in which markets they operate. Especially
the subject of marketing turned out to be very interesting for me and that is why I wrote a skilled work (a what??) about that topic in grade 12.
After I had finished school, I have also completed a voluntary year in social services in a private hospital and by my own request I could assist in the management there, so I was able to get to know the workflows and duties of this institution, what I have really liked.
Furthermore I am greatly interested in different nations and cultures. This may come from my own multicultural background. Since I was born in Russia and moved to Germany when I was 4 years old, I have learned a lot about both cultures, because on the one hand my parents have provided me the Russian culture and on the other hand I have learned the German culture through friends and by living in this country. The more varieties I have recognized in the two cultures the more absorbing they were for me. Furthermore I really like the fact to study in English (Du magst die Tatsache in Englisch zu studieren? Das macht keinen Sinn) because nowadays it is essential to be proficient in English if you want to become successful in the global business environment.
That is why I have made the decision to study International Business. This will give me the possibility to learn all the facts about economy and management and simultaneously I will become acquainted with different cultures and I will be prepared to work in foreign countries, where I can experience those civilizations.
I chose the Saxion University, because I admire the actuality, that the classes in Saxion are very small, so that the teacher is able to attend to every single student.
Beside I like the project we have to deal with as we get in contact with other students and exercise ourselves in teamwork in which I am unpracticed yet.
Since the studies began, I have been working hard to reach my determinated aims. I am spending at least two hours a day towards them, because I know of the importance of being ambitious and disciplined.
In the future I would like to work in an advertising agency or maybe set up my own one.

Yours faithfully,
******

Achte unbedingt auf die Zeiten!
I wird immer gross geschrieben!
Verwende ein Woerterbuch!

[andeeey]

Hey Keswik,
thanks a lot for your help! I have still some question left:
skilled work should mean "Facharbeit" in german?!
Voluntary Year of Social Service should have the same meaning as FSJ (Freiwilliges Soziales Jahr) in german, so I wanted to ask, if it is Voluntary Year of or in Social Service and what is about the upper and lower case?
In this sentence: "After I had finished school, I have also completed a voluntary year in social services in a private hospital" I thought, that I have to use different times, because when I completed the voluntery year, I had already finished school?!
And the last question is about your comment:
Sollte ich das mit der Tatsache, dass ich gerne auf Englisch studieren würde weglassen? Damit wollte ich ausdrücken, dass ich auch BWL auf deutsch studieren könnte, aber es mir wichtig ist mein Englisch zu verbessern, da dies n der heutigen Arbeitswelt einfach unumgänglich ist!
lg

[Keswick]

Hey Keswick,
thanks a lot for your help! I have still some question left:
skilled work should mean "Facharbeit" in German?!
Voluntary Year of Social Service should have the same meaning as FSJ (Freiwilliges Soziales Jahr) in German, so I wanted to ask, if it is Voluntary Year of or in Social Service and what is it about the upper and lower case?
In this sentence: "After I had finished school, I have also completed a voluntary year in social services in a private hospital" I thought, that I have to use different times, because when I completed the voluntery year, I had already finished school?!
And the last question is about your comment:
Sollte ich das mit der Tatsache, dass ich gerne auf Englisch studieren würde weglassen? Damit wollte ich ausdrücken, dass ich auch BWL auf deutsch studieren könnte, aber es mir wichtig ist mein Englisch zu verbessern, da dies n der heutigen Arbeitswelt einfach unumgänglich ist!
lg

1. skilled work = Facharbeit, wurde mir vom dem Kontext her nicht klar, ist aber richtig
2. voluntary year of service klein geschrieben ist ueblich.
3. Du hast beides, Schule und FSJ, in der Vergangenheit beendet, daher die Vergangenheitsform.
4. Wenn du ausdruecken willst, dass du in Englisch studieren willst, musst du das auch in den richtigen Kontext setzen und detaillierter erklaeren. Von der deutschen und russischen Kultur auf die Tatsache zu springen, dass du in Englisch studieren willst, ohne jeglichen sinnvollen Uebergang ist, als erzaehlte ich dir (mal ueberspitzt ausgedrueckt) "Die Kultur der Normannen in Northumberland ist belegt durch archaeologische Funde. Und ausserdem mag ich Erdbeereis" .

[Delfino]

Facharbeit hat ja im Deutschen zwei Bedeutungen:
1.) die Arbeit einer gut ausgebildeten Person
2.) das schriftliche Ergebnis

@Keswick
Woher weiß ich beim einfachen DE / EN Wörterbuch,
dass die Benutzung auch für die o.g. 2. Bedeutung möglich ist?
Gibt es da im Englischen keinen Unterschied?

1.)
Our staff members are well trained and qualify regularly
both in our company and externally.
Therefore, we can ensure competent skilled work.

2.)
wird skilled work im Englischen wirklich auch in dieser 2. Bedeutung benutzt?

Wie und wo findet man hierzu gute Beispiele/Quellen?

Mich interessiert vor allem - Wie du so etwas suchst/findest...

[Keswick]

Hi Delfino! Gute Frage !

Das schriftliche Ergebnis wuerde ich nicht mit skilled work uebersetzen, da work Arbeit ist, oder eine Taetigkeit, eine schriftliche Arbeit, Bau, im technischen Sinn auch das Formen etc. . Ein Ergebnis ist ein result. Daher wuerde das zweite von dir genannte Beispiel "das schriftliche Ergebnis" nicht mit skilled work uebersetzen. ABER: die deutsche Facharbeit die man in der Schule schreiben muss ist nicht nur ein schriftliches Ergebnis sondern die Arbeit einer gebildeten Person. Du schreibst eine fachlich (mehr oder weniger) ausgereifte Arbeit ueber ein Thema, das du dir aneignest. Insofern darf man sich hier was die Uebersetzung angeht, nicht auf das Ergebnis als solches versteifen, sondern auf die Arbeit und den Prozess der Arbeit an sich. In diesem moment bist du der "Facharbeiter" der skilled worker, der an einer Facharbeit arbeitet. Daher ist die Uebersetzung mit skilled work legitim.

Oh weiha.. wo suche ich und wie finde ich? Schwere Frage. Ich suche selbstverstaendlich durch Woerterbuecher, wobei ich hier als Uebersetzer einiges an Auswahl habe. Abgesehen davon suche ich Woerter im Kontext, was vor allem bei Finanzuebersetzungen eine Weile dauern kann, bis man das findet, was man sucht. Und letztendlich suche und finde ich in meinem Umfeld (mein Mann ist Englaender, meine Kollegen, Mitmenschen..) und in meiner Erfahrung, da ich schon einige Jahre in England lebe. Die eigene Spracherfahrung spielt eine grosse Rolle, denn viele Dinge die man in den Woerterbuechern findet wuerde ein Englaender nicht (oder nicht mehr) so sagen. Oder aber man hoert umgangssprachliche Ausdruecke, die man nie angewendet hat, weil man sie nicht kannte.

[Delfino]

...
Das schriftliche Ergebnis wuerde ich nicht mit skilled work uebersetzen, ...

ok, das hatte ich mir auch so gedacht...

Das man die Facharbeit auch in dem von dir geschilderten Zusammenhang verstehen kann ist
mir nicht sofort aufgefallen, dann macht es wohl Sinn...

Tipp: Beispielübersetzungen
http://www.linguee.de/search?direction=auto&query=