Bitte korrigieren - Bin euch sehr dankbar!

[PeterPaul]

Liebe Englisch-Hilfen Community,

Ich muss in der 11ten Klasse in einer Woche ein sehr wichtiges Referat über die Golden Gate bridge in San Francisco halten. Von diesem Referat hängt bei mir einiges ab und so habe ich mir auch sehr viel Mühe beim erstellen gegeben. Da ich mir aber mit der Grammatik u.s.w. nicht 100 % sicher bin wollte ich euch um Hilfe beten und hoffen, dass mir jemand meine Fehler korrigert und sagt, was ich noch ändern sollte!

Hier das Referat:

My presentation is about the Golden Gate bridge in San Francisco. I choose this because I think that it is one of the most wonderful bridges of the world and my uncle gave me an English book from the gift Golden Gate bridge (bei dem fett markierten Text bin ich mir sehr unsicher)!

At the beginning of the 20th century the technology was so far advanced that it was possible to build a bridge from San Fransisco to Marin peninsulaacross the Golden Gate Bay. The problemes were the weather, the fog, the deep water and the danger of earthquakes in the region. The engineer Joseph Strauss had to build a rope bridge because the bay is a shipping aera and that´s the reason why he couldn´t built a pillar in the middle of the river. The construction of the 2.700m long bridge was aprroved in 1924, but they couldn´t start to build before 1933. During construction time 10 building workers died when a scaffold broke and they fell 70 meters down into the water. In the year 1937 the bridge was opened by president Roosevelt. The constructor Jospeh Strauss died one year after the bridge was finished at the age of 68.

The total costs of the bridge was over 37 million dollars. The bridge was finally paid in the year 1971 through the toll charge of the cars. The toll charges have to be paid only on the way into the city by cars. The opposite direction is free. In one day there are driving more than 70 000 cars across the bridge. There are 6 roadways which can be changed acording to the density of the traffic. The paint of the bridge is a special developed colour , International Orange. 5 painters always work on the bridge. They need about one and a half year for the whole paintwork. Than they have to beginn again.

Jumping from the bridge is a rather common method to commit suicide, with about one jump every two weeks, for a total of well over 1,200 suicides, only 26 survived the jump.When the people jump down the bridge they hit the water with 120 km/h and the fall takes 4 seconds.
But for all that I think the bridge is among the most beautiful bridges in the world and it is the landmark of San Fransisco.

Wie fandet ihr den Text? Wo sind Fehler? Was würdet ihr verbessern?

Ich sage schonmal 100000 Dank für eure Hilfe und wünsche euch einen schönen Samstag Abend!

Mit freundlichen Grüßen
Peter

[Keswick]

My presentation is about the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco. I chose this topic because I think that it the Golden Gate Bridge one of the most wonderful bridges of the world and my uncle gave me an English book from the gift Golden Gate bridge (bei dem fett markierten Text bin ich mir sehr unsicher)! (Was willst du denn damit sagen?)

At the beginning of the 20th century the technology was so far advanced that it was possible to build a bridge from San Fransisco to Marin peninsula across the Golden Gate Bay. The problems were the weather, the fog, the deep water and the risk of earthquakes in the region. The engineer Joseph Strauss had to build a rope bridge because the bay is a shipping area and that´s the reason why he couldn´t built a pillar in the middle of the river. The construction of the 2.700m long bridge was approved in 1924, but they couldn´t start to build before 1933. During the time of construction 10 construction workers died when a scaffold broke and they fell 70 meters down into the water. In the year 1937 the bridge was opened by president Roosevelt. The constructor Joseph Strauss died one year after the bridge was finished. He was 68 years old.

The total costs of the bridge were over 37 million dollars. The bridge was finally paid off in the year 1971, through the toll charge of the cars. The toll charges have to be paid by drivers on the way into the city. Outbound traffic is is free. In one day there are more than 70 000 cars going over the bridge. There are 6 lanes which can be changed accordingly to the density of the traffic. The paint of the bridge is a special developed colour, International Orange. 5 painters always work on the bridge. They need about one and a half years for the whole paintwork. Then they have to start again.

Jumping from the bridge is a rather common method to commit suicide, with about one jump every two weeks, for a total of well over 1,200 suicides, only 26 survived the jump. When the people jump off the bridge they hit the water at 120 km/h and the fall takes 4 seconds.
But for all that I think the bridge is among the most beautiful bridges in the world and it is the landmark of San Fransisco.

Interessanter Text .

[Delfino]

In my presentation I'm going to talk about the Golden Gate bridge in San Francisco. I choose this topic because I think that it is one of the most wonderful bridges of the world and my uncle gave me an English book about the Golden Gate bridge as a gift.

At the beginning of the 20th century the technology was so far advanced that it was possible to build a bridge from San Fransisco to Marin Peninsula across the Golden Gate Bay. The main problems were the fast changing weather, the fog, the deep water and especially the danger of earthquakes in this region. The engineer Joseph Strauss had to design a rope bridge because the bay is used for shipping. Therefore pillars in the middle of the river were not an option. The construction of the 2,700m long bridge was approved in 1924, but they couldn't start to work before 1933. During the time of construction 10 workers died in accident when a scaffold broke and they fell 70 meters down into the water. In the year 1937 the bridge was opened by president Roosevelt. The architect Joseph Strauss died at the age of 68 - one year after the bridge was finished.

The total costs of the bridge were over 37 million dollars. Through the toll charges the bridge was finally paid for in the year 1971. The toll charges are only paid for cars on the way into the city. The opposite direction is free. More than 70,000 cars are driving across the bridge on one day. There are 6 roadways which can be changed according to the density of the traffic. The paint of the bridge is a special developed colour, International Orange. 5 painters always work on the bridge. They need about one and a half year for the whole paintwork. Then they have to begin again.

Jumping from the bridge is a rather common method to commit suicide with about one jump every two weeks. This sums up to a total of well over 1,200 suicides. Only 26 survived the jump. When people jump off the bridge they hit the water with nearly 120 km/h and their fall takes about 4 seconds.

Despite this really sad fact I think the bridge is among the most beautiful bridges in the world and it is the landmark of San Fransisco.

[PeterPaul]

Vielen dank an auch beide. Ihr habt mir echt extrem geholfen.

@Delfino und @all

Ich finde den Text so wie er in deinem Beitrag steht nun perfekt. Soll ich ihn so lassen?

Mit freundlichen Grüßen
Peter

[Keswick]

Wen meinst du denn jetzt?

[Delfino]

Ich sehe Keswick hat noch ein paar mehr Fehler gefunden.

Also:

In my presentation I'm going to talk about the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco. I chose this topic because I think that it is one of the most wonderful bridges of the world and my uncle gave me an English book about the Golden Gate bridge as a gift.

At the beginning of the 20th century the technology was so far advanced that it was possible to build a bridge from San Fransisco to Marin Peninsula across the Golden Gate Bay. The main problems were the fast changing weather, the fog, the deep water and especially the danger of earthquakes in this region. The engineer Joseph Strauss had to design a rope bridge because the bay is used for commercial shipping. Therefore placing pillars in the middle of the river was not an option for him. The construction of the 2,700m long bridge was approved in 1924, but they couldn't start to build before 1933. During the time of construction 10 workers died in accident when a scaffold broke and they fell 70 meters down into the water. In the year 1937 the bridge was opened by president Roosevelt. The architect Joseph Strauss died one year after the bridge was finished. He was 68 years old.

The total costs of the bridge were over 37 million dollars. The bridge was finally paid off in 1971, through the toll charge of the cars. The toll charges have to be paid by drivers on the way into the city. Outbound traffic is is free. In one day there are more than 70 000 cars going over the bridge. There are 6 lanes which can be changed accordingly to the density of the traffic. The paint of the bridge is a special developed colour, International Orange. 5 painters always work on the bridge. They need about one and a half years for the whole paintwork. Then they have to start again.


Jumping from the bridge is a rather common method to commit suicide with about one jump every two weeks. This sums up to a total of well over 1,200 suicides. Only 26 survived the jump. When people jump off the bridge they hit the water at 120 km/h and their fall takes about 4 seconds.

Despite this really sad fact I think the bridge is among the most beautiful bridges in the world and it is the landmark of San Fransisco.

[PeterPaul]

Nochmal vielen dank an euch beide. Wenn ich das nun richtig gesehen habe sind in dem letzten Post von Delfino nun alle Fehler weg die auch Keswick gefunden hat. Würdet ihr den Text dann so nehmen?

Vielen dank an euch!

Mit freundlichen Grüßen
Peter

[Keswick]

Ja den Text kannst du meiner Meinung nach so verwenden, auch inhaltlich ist er gut. Nun bin ich jedenfalls was die Golden Gate Bridge angeht, einiges schlauer.

[PeterPaul]

Ich würde auf ein Plakatt noch folgende Daten machen:

Length : 2,7 km
Pending part: 1,3 km
Width: 27m
Road above water: 70m
Total heigh: 227m
Length of the middle cable: 2,3 km
Caliber of the cable: 91 cm

Was haltet ihr davon?

Mit freundlichen Grüßen
Peter

[Keswick]

Ja, das finde ich gut. Bringst du das als blosse Fakten rein oder als Text?

[PeterPaul]

Das sind reine Fakten, die ich auf das Plakat mache

Mit freundlichen Grüßen
Peter

[Keswick]

Ja, Fakten sind immer gut .

[Lauderdale]

Noch etwas Senf.....

In my presentation I'm going to talk about the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco. I chose this topic because I think that it is one of the most wonderful bridges of the world and my uncle gave me an English book about the Golden Gate bridge as a gift.

At the beginning of the 20th century the technology was so far advanced that it was possible to build a bridge from San Fransisco to Marin Peninsula across the Golden Gate Bay. The main problems were the fast changing weather, the fog, the deep water and especially the danger of earthquakes in this region. The engineer Joseph Strauss had to design a rope bridge because the bay is used for commercial shipping. {Rope heisst Seil....hat er zunaechst eine Seilbruecke gebaut, oder meinst du Haengebruecke = suspension bridge?} Therefore placing pillars in the middle of the river was not an option for him. The construction of the 2,700m long bridge was approved in 1924, but they couldn't start to build before 1933. During the time of construction 10 workers died in an accident when a scaffold broke and they fell 70 meters down into the water. In the year 1937 the bridge was opened by president Roosevelt. The architect Joseph Strauss died one year after the bridge was finished. He was 68 years old.

The total costs of the bridge were over 37 million dollars. The bridge was finally paid off in 1971, through the toll charge of the cars. The toll charges have to be paid by drivers on the way into the city. Outbound traffic is is free. In one day there are more than 70 000 cars going over the bridge. There are 6 lanes which can be changed accordinglyto the density of the traffic. The paint of the bridge is a specially developed colour, International Orange. 5 painters always work on the bridge. They need about one and a half years for the whole paintwork. Then they have to start again.


Jumping from the bridge is a rather common method to commit suicide with about one jump every two weeks. This sums up to a total of well over 1,200 suicides. Only 26 have survived the jump. When people jump off the bridge they hit the water at 120 km/h and their fall takes about 4 seconds.

Oben: Present Perfect, weil der Vorgang bis in die Gegenwart dauert. Leider.

Despite this really sad fact I think the bridge is among the most beautiful bridges in the world and it is the landmark of San Fransisco.

[PeterPaul]

Vielen dank für deine Hilfe. Ich habe Seilbrücke gemeint

Mit freundlichen Grüßen
Peter

[PeterPaul]

There are 6 lanes which can be changed accordingly to the density of the traffic. The paint of the bridge is a specially developed colour, International Orange. 5 painters always work on the bridge. They need about one and a half years for the whole paintwork. Then they have to start again.

Muss das according oder accordingly heißen?

Outbound traffic is is free.

Muss das nicht "Outbound traffic is free." heißen? Ansonsten ist jetzt alles perfekt oder?

Mit freundlichen Grüßen
Peter