Hallö,
ich schreibe demnächst eine Klassenarbeit und wir müssen ein Argument schreiben, mein Übungsargument über "für das Walfischen oder gegen das Wahflischen von Eskimos:
If you aks me what I think about whaling, I say whaling is not very good for the nature, but the eskimos must have the whalfeed. On the one hand is the nature. Whals are with other animals, in the minority. The whal is the biggest mammal of the world, but in the year of 2005 I think the eskimos can eat other food, maybe wild-geeses or fish. On the other side there is the eskimos. In alaska the wheather is cold, for this reason grow not there, and the eskimos must have eaten whalfeed since many 100 years and so was it an old Inuit tradition. So all in all I think only eskimos should be allowed whaling, because people from other states can eat fruits vegetable and other meat.
Wörter: 131
Mein letztes Argument in der Englischarbeit war
Grammatik: 5
Inhalt: 4
=
Gesammtnote: 4+ (weil ich in Aufg. Lückentext eine 1hatte )
Ich gehe auf das Gymnasium 8.Klasse wenn eine Bewertung möglich wäre, würde ich mcih freuen.
Vielen Dank für die Mühe.
Textverbesserung für E arbeit
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Hab mal was geschrieben, bin aber vom Quelltext ein bisschen abgeschweift, sorry
In my opinion whaling does great damage to the wildlife and the question is as to whether Eskimos have a legitimate right to do it. The whale is not only the world’s largest mammal but also the largest animal to have ever lived that we know of. If drastic measures are not taken against whaling immediately, whales will become extinct within a very short period of time. Although Eskimos have been eating whale meat for hundreds of years, they should consider eating other food, such as wild geese or fish. Admittedly, it is a very difficult place to grow agricultural products. For this reason and for the sake of a very old Inuit tradition they should be permitted to whaling but only in a restricted way. Any other people should be prohibited from whaling completely.
135 Wörter
In my opinion whaling does great damage to the wildlife and the question is as to whether Eskimos have a legitimate right to do it. The whale is not only the world’s largest mammal but also the largest animal to have ever lived that we know of. If drastic measures are not taken against whaling immediately, whales will become extinct within a very short period of time. Although Eskimos have been eating whale meat for hundreds of years, they should consider eating other food, such as wild geese or fish. Admittedly, it is a very difficult place to grow agricultural products. For this reason and for the sake of a very old Inuit tradition they should be permitted to whaling but only in a restricted way. Any other people should be prohibited from whaling completely.
135 Wörter
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- Bilingual Newbie
- Beiträge: 5
- Registriert: 26. Sep 2005 20:16
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- Linguistic Guru
- Beiträge: 694
- Registriert: 22. Sep 2005 20:01
Dein Text war mir ein wenig zu unstrukturiert (meiner ist zwar auch nicht viel besser, aber wie auch immer...)
Nur einige wenige Hinweise:
- "Natur" ist nicht immer "nature", in diesem Kontext passt
m. E. "wildlife" besser
- whales nicht whals
- der Plural von goose ist geese, nicht geeses
- "since" ist für Zeitpunkte, z. B. "since 1912", bei den 100 Jahren musst
du "for" nehmen
- Alaska nicht alaska
- Eskimos nicht eskimos
- on the one hand - on the other hand (nicht side)
- was ist "whalfeed"?
- "for this reason grow not there" Was soll das heißen? Was wächst dort
nicht? Wenn, dann "... does not grow there..."
Nur so das wesentliche...
Note: Kann ich nichts zu sagen, bin kein Lehrer, sorry!
Nur einige wenige Hinweise:
- "Natur" ist nicht immer "nature", in diesem Kontext passt
m. E. "wildlife" besser
- whales nicht whals
- der Plural von goose ist geese, nicht geeses
- "since" ist für Zeitpunkte, z. B. "since 1912", bei den 100 Jahren musst
du "for" nehmen
- Alaska nicht alaska
- Eskimos nicht eskimos
- on the one hand - on the other hand (nicht side)
- was ist "whalfeed"?
- "for this reason grow not there" Was soll das heißen? Was wächst dort
nicht? Wenn, dann "... does not grow there..."
Nur so das wesentliche...
Note: Kann ich nichts zu sagen, bin kein Lehrer, sorry!