Political Jokes

[Cliff]

One day Bill Clinton was out jogging -- and accidentally fell from a bridge into a very cold river.

Three boys, playing along the river, saw the accident. Without a second thought, they jumped in the water and dragged the wet president out of the river.

After cleaning up he said, "Boys, you saved the President of the United States today. You deserve a reward. You name it, I'll give it to you."

The first boy said, "Please, I'd like a ticket to Disneyland!"

"I'll personally hand it to you," said Mr. Clinton.

"I'd like a pair of Nike Air Turbos," the second boy said.

"I'll buy them myself and give them to you," said the grateful defender of the Western Hemisphere.

"And I'd like a wheelchair with a stereo in it," said the third boy.

"I'll personally ... wait a second, son, you're not handicapped!"

"No, but I will be when my father finds out whom I saved from drowning."

[Cliff]

Bush and Gore went fishing. Gore went on one side of the lake and Bush on the other. Later that day, Bush came back with 129 fish and Gore came back with none.
Gore screamed for a revote.

The next day bush came back with 173 fish and Gore once again screamed for a revote.

So on the third day, Gore sent a secret service to spy on Bush. Bush came back with 293 fish this time and gore got none. Gore goes to the secret service spy and asks whether Bush is cheating.

"Yes," replied the spy, "he's putting holes in the ice."

[Cliff]

A man walked into a cowboy bar and ordered a beer just as President Bush appeared on the television. After a few sips, he

looked up at the television and mumbled, "Now, there's the biggest horse's ass I've ever seen."

A customer at the end of the bar quickly stood up, walked over to
him, and decked him.

A few minutes later, as the man was finishing his beer, Mrs. Bush
appeared on the television. "She's a horse's ass too," the man.

This time, a customer at the other end of the bar quickly stood up,
walked over to him, and knocked him off his stool.

"Damn it!" the man said, climbing back up to the bar. "This must be
Bush country!"

"Nope," the bartender replied. "Horse country!"