essay korrwkturlesen

[langstrumpf86]

hallo,
es wäre echt super wenn zufällig jemand zeit hätte, mal über mein essay drüber zu gucken!
vielen dank schonmal!!

Topic: Many people believe that women make better parents than men and that this is why they have the greater role in raising children in most societies. Others claim that men are just as good as women at parenting.
Write an essay expressing your point of view. Give reasons for your answer.

One achievement of the emancipation development is the right for women to have an occupation. This may have caused a change in family structure in some societies. Nevertheless, when it comes to the issue of children many people still think the mother should stay home for the reason that she makes better parents than the father. In my opinion fathers can be as good parents as mothers. But first I will reflect on some arguments of both sides.

One big argument of the advocates for the mothers as better parents is that the first phase of a child’s life when the mother feeds the baby is very important for the development of the relationship. Even though I doubt that it could not be the same when the father would feed the baby with a bottle, I think this still does not justify that a mother is better at parenting than a father because it concerns only a short life (lebensabschnitt) and not the whole development
Another argument is that it was meant like this by nature because in former times men used to go hunting and women stayed in the caves and cared for the children. But I think that made sense in a time when there were life threatening enemies and men were just stronger than women so they could protect the family better. Nowadays, we live in a very different culture in which it is not necessary any more that men protect women from enemies. Instead men and women are equal and as we do not live in the wilderness I think an argument like this can not be taken seriously any more.
In my opinion the fact whether someone is a good parent or not is based on his personality and not on his . Some people are more capable of raising children and maybe also enjoy staying at home and caring for them. Others in contrast need to work, possibly they are more ambitious and want to achieve something concerning their career. Although I am not sure whether the one character trait really excludes the other one. I think one can also be a good parent and be interested in raising his child and at the same time have a job and be ambitious in it. In this case it would be the easiest way if parents just share the responsibilities for their children and thus find a middle course between work and children education. But that decision has to be made by each couple on his own and depends on the concepts couples have about what a family should look like.
Besides, I believe the reason that women have the greater role in raising children in most societies can not be found in the fact that women make better parents than men. (It is rather the other way round.) It is rather for the reason that the women’s task has been the housework and the caring for the children for a long time and people got used to this idea. So it needs some time to change that role model in people’s minds. In my generation there is still the old role model present when our parents talk about their childhood. So my generation may have had the first fathers doing more child education than their partners. This shows how young the idea is that a man could stay home and care about the children, too.
But one should not forget that women in former times were not asked whether they preferred to stay at home or do a job or even whether they think they are the better parents. Consequently, the argument that women are better parents because they take the greater role in raising children does not work for me.
Theoretically, men and women are equal nowadays but for a real translation into action the circumstances have to change, too. This means that a society that allows both men and women to work also has to offer opportunities to take some time out to raise the children for both parents.
Further more, in my point of view the question who is better in parenting should not be asked at all. Since it is known that it is very important for a child’s development to have both, a father and a mother, one should try to share this responsibility equally. In case someone does not see himself as being capable of raising up children, instead of thinking he then could leave that part for his wife, he should rather question himself why he wants to have children at all.

So, all in all I am convinced that men are just as good at parenting as women. Since women did the housework for quite a long time they still tend to have a greater role in raising children in many societies. But with the equality movement women gained the same rights as men have. This leads to a process of adapting the society to these new circumstances. In a consequence people could start discussing the question newly who should do the housework and who should go to work and as a means of decision use the opinion that one has to be better in parenting than the other. But I think it would be better when people instead would think about a possibility how to share the raising up of their children.

[Keswick]

Hallo,
es wäre echt super wenn zufällig jemand Zeit hätte, mal über mein essay drüber zu gucken!
Vielen Dank schonmal!!

Topic: Many people believe that women make better parents than men and that this is why they have the greater role in raising children in most societies. Others claim that men are just as good as women at parenting.
Write an essay expressing your point of view. Give reasons for your answer.

One achievement of the emancipation development is the right for women to have an occupation. This may have caused a change in family structure in some societies. Nevertheless, when it comes to the issue of children many people still think the mother should stay home for the reason that she makes a better parent than the father. In my opinion fathers can be as good parents as mothers. But first I will reflect on some arguments of both sides.

One big argument of the advocates for the mothers as better parents is that the first phase of a child’s life when the mother feeds the baby is very important for the development of the relationship between mother and child. Even though I doubt that it could not be the same when the father would feed the baby with a bottle, I think this still does not justify that a mother is better at parenting than a father because it concerns only a short life (lebensabschnitt)(benutze ein Woerterbuch) and not the whole development of the child.
Another argument is that it was meant like this by nature because in former times men used to go hunting and women stayed in the caves and cared for the children. But I think that made sense in a time when there were life threatening enemies and men were just stronger than women so they could protect the family better. Nowadays, we live in a very different culture in which it is not necessary any more that men protect women from enemies. Instead men and women are equal and as we do not live in the wilderness I think an argument like this can not be taken seriously any more.
In my opinion the fact whether someone is a good parent or not is based on their personality and not on their (on their what?) . Some people are more capable of raising children and maybe also enjoy staying at home and caring for them. Others in contrast need to work, possibly they are more ambitious and want to achieve something concerning their career. Although I am not sure whether the one character trait really excludes the other one. I think one can also be a good parent and be interested in raising their child and at the same time have a job and be ambitious at it. In this case it would be the easiest way if parents just shared the responsibilities for their children and thus find a middle course between work and children education. But that decision has to be made by each couple on his own and depends on the concepts couples have about what a family should look like.
Besides, I believe the reason that women have the greater role in raising children in most societies can not be found in the fact that women make better parents than men. (It is rather the other way round.) It is rather for the reason that the women’s tasks have been the housework and the caring for the children for a long time and people got used to this idea. So it needs some time to change that role model in people’s minds. In my generation there is still the old role model present when our parents talk about their childhood. So my generation may have had the first fathers doing more for child education than their partners. This shows how young the idea that a man could stay home and care about the children, too, is.
But one should not forget that women in former times were not asked whether they preferred staying at home or doing a job or even whether they think they are the better parents. Consequently, the argument that women are better parents because they take the greater role in raising children does not work for me.
Theoretically, men and women are equal nowadays but for a real translation into action the circumstances have to change, too. This means that a society that allows both men and women to work also has to offer opportunities to take some time out for both parents to raise the children.
Furthermore, in my point of view the question who is better in parenting should not be asked at all. Since it is known that it is very important for a child’s development to have both, a father and a mother, one should try to share this responsibility equally. In case a man does not see himself as being capable of raising up children, instead of thinking he then could leave that part to his wife, he should rather question himself why he wants to have children at all.

So, all in all I am convinced that men are just as good at parenting as women. Since women have been doing the housework for quite a long time they still tend to have a greater role in raising children in many societies. But with the equality movement women gained the same rights as men have. This leads to a process of adapting these new circumstances into society. In a consequence people could start discussing the question who should do the housework and who should go to work from a new point of view and as means of decision (was meinst du hier?) use the opinion that one has to be better in parenting than the other. But I think it would be better if people instead thought about a possibility how to share the raising up of their children.

[langstrumpf86]

Also erstmal vielen Dank für die superschnelle Antwort!! Sehr nett!
"In my opinion the fact whether someone is a good parent or not is based on their personality and not on their (on their what?) . " Sagt man "their" obwohl "someone" in der Einzahl steht? Ich meine im Sinne von Geschlecht, also, dass es nichts mit dem Geschlecht zu tun hat, ob man ein guter Elternteil sein kann.

"In a consequence people could start discussing the question who should do the housework and who should go to work from a new point of view and as means of decision (was meinst du hier?) use the opinion that one has to be better in parenting than the other." Ich meine, dass man als Entscheidungsgrundlage das Kriterium nehmen kann, wer der bessere Elternteil ist.
So, in meiner verbesserten Version sieht der Text jetzt so aus:

Many people believe that women make better parents than men and that this is why they have the greater role in raising children in most societies. Others claim that men are just as good as women at parenting.
Write an essay expressing your point of view. Give reasons for your answer.

One achievement of the emancipation development is the right for women to have an occupation. This may have caused a change in family structure in some societies. Nevertheless, when it comes to the issue of children many people still think the mother should stay home for the reason that she makes a better parent than the father. In my opinion fathers can be as good parents as mothers. But first I will reflect on some arguments of both sides.

One big argument of the advocates for the mothers as better parents is that the first phase of a child’s life when the mother feeds the baby is very important for the development of the relationship between mother and child. Even though I doubt that it could not be the same when the father would feed the baby with a bottle, I think this still does not justify that a mother is better at parenting than a father because it concerns only a short phase of life and not the whole development of the child.
Another argument is that it was meant like this by nature because in former times men used to go hunting and women stayed in the caves and cared for the children. But I think that made sense in a time when there were life threatening enemies and men were just stronger than women so they could protect the family better. Nowadays, we live in a very different culture in which it is not necessary any more that men protect women from enemies. Instead men and women are equal and as we do not live in the wilderness I think an argument like this can not be taken seriously any more.
In my opinion the fact whether someone is a good parent or not is based on their personality and not on their . Some people are more capable of raising children and maybe also enjoy staying at home and caring for them. Others in contrast need to work, possibly they are more ambitious and want to achieve something concerning their career. Although I am not sure whether the one character trait really excludes the other one. I think one can also be a good parent and be interested in raising their child and at the same time have a job and be ambitious at it. In this case it would be the easiest way if parents just shared the responsibilities for their children and thus find a middle course between work and children education. But that decision has to be made by each couple on his own and depends on the concepts couples have about what a family should look like.
Besides, I believe the reason that women have the greater role in raising children in most societies can not be found in the fact that women make better parents than men. (It is rather the other way round.) It is rather for the reason that the women’s task have been housework and the caring for the children for a long time and people got used to this idea. So it needs some time to change that role model in people’s minds. In my generation there is still the old role model present when our parents talk about their childhood. So my generation may have had the first fathers doing more for child education than their partners. This shows how young the idea that a man could stay home and care about the children, too, is.
But one should not forget that women in former times were not asked whether they preferred staying at home or doing a job or even whether they think they are the better parents. Consequently, the argument that women are better parents because they take the greater role in raising children does not work for me.
Theoretically, men and women are equal nowadays but for a real translation into action the circumstances have to change, too. This means that a society that allows both men and women to work also has to offer opportunities to take some time out for both parents to raise the children.
Furthermore, in my point of view the question who is better in parenting should not be asked at all. Since it is known that it is very important for a child’s development to have both, a father and a mother, one should try to share this responsibility equally. In case a man does not see himself as being capable of raising up children, instead of thinking he could leave that part to his wife, he should rather question himself why he wants to have children at all.

So, all in all I am convinced that men are just as good at parenting as women. Since women have been doing the housework for quite a long time they still tend to have a greater role in raising children in many societies. But with the equality movement women gained the same rights as men. This leads to a process of adapting these new circumstances into society. In a consequence people could start discussing the question who should do the housework and who should go to work from a new point of view and as a means of decision use the opinion that one has to be better in parenting than the other. But I think it would be better if people instead would thought about a possibility how to share the raising up of their children.

[Keswick]

Also erstmal vielen Dank für die superschnelle Antwort!! Sehr nett!
"In my opinion the fact whether someone is a good parent or not is based on their personality and not on their (on their what?) . " Sagt man "their" obwohl "someone" in der Einzahl steht? Ich meine im Sinne von Geschlecht, also, dass es nichts mit dem Geschlecht zu tun hat, ob man ein guter Elternteil sein kann.

"their" wird dann verwendet, wenn man von beiden Geschlechtern spricht bzw. wenn kein Geschlecht spezifisch genannt wurde (das ist bei dir hier im Satz der Fall).
Dann musst du das Wort Geschlecht aber noch einarbeiten, denn so wie dein Satz momentan steht fehlt ein Wort.

"In a consequence people could start discussing the question who should do the housework and who should go to work from a new point of view and as means of decision (was meinst du hier?) use the opinion that one has to be better in parenting than the other." Ich meine, dass man als Entscheidungsgrundlage das Kriterium nehmen kann, wer der bessere Elternteil ist.

Achso, verstanden. Danke!

[langstrumpf86]

Anscheinend wird das Wort immer wieder zensiert aus meinem Text, denn in meiner Version steht es drin. Das erklärt natürlich einiges
Vielen Dank nochmal!

[Keswick]

Achso! Na dann ist mir auch klar, wieso das was fehlt!