korrektur?

[cy1988]

Hallo,

wir müssen Hausaufgaben in Englisch erledigen, die meine Lehrerin dann einsammeln möchte.
Deshalb wäre es total nett, wenn jemand bereit wäre, meinen Text zu korrigieren.
Gibt es hier so eine Möglichkeit?
In anderen Foren wurde mir nicht geantwortet. Ich bräuchte das Ergebnis bis Freitag. Und der Abgabetermin ist der 2. September.

Vielen Dank im Voraus

LG
cy1988


The given extract out of the newspaper”The Washington Post Company“ written by Ariel Dorfman, talks about the national anthem which was translated and singed in a Spanish version. The author of the text wants to show his point of view and also wants to get the support of his readers.
First of all the author does not give his own opinion to this issue because he tries first to underline and reinforce the given problem. When he says that a lot of people are against this anthem, he can persuade more readers. This is why the text directly starts talking about the radio station which has published the national anthem on the radio in the new Spanish version. However, this was not received in a positive way by the United States: „…with an unprecedented and, indeed ...the United States“(ll.3). With the help of this introduction the reader gets know that the text is talking about an unacceptable situation.
He continues talking about other groups which gave also their own opinions „Talk shows hosts and academics…. a desecration of a national symbol. “(ll.5) Moreover he gives the opinion of senators and also of George W. Bush. With this strategy the author achieves many readers because he repeats the arguments and attitudes of very important persons so that the readers trust to this opinions and also get persuaded by them. He also gives the statement of George W. Bush „ one of the important things here is, when we debate this issue, that we do not lose our national soul“and indirectly hides his own request that the population should debate and do something against the Spanish anthem.
The third part of the text starts with lots of rhetorical questions which have the function to make the readers think about the given situation. The author also uses words like „crooning“ and „outcry“ which describe the Spanish version of the anthem in a negative way. This is also a strategy of the author to distance the readers from the „Nuestro Himno“.
Moreover he makes clear that this is dangerous for the United States, if such issues are accepted, because America should not become a bilingual nation. At the end of the text he indirectly requests again that the American civilization should not give up and avoid a bilingual nation: „…and America will sometime be articulating its identity in two languages...“(ll.50)

[Delfino]

Btw. the article "Waving the Star-Spanglish Banner" written by "Ariel Dorfman"
can be found here:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/co ... 01728.html

[michael123]

The given extract out of the newspaper”The Washington Post Company“ written by Ariel Dorfman, talks about the national anthem which was translated and sung in a Spanish version. The author of the text wants to show his point of view and also wants to get the support of his readers.
First of all the author does not give his own opinion on this issue because he tries first to underline and reinforce the given problem. When he says that a lot of people are against this anthem, he is trying to persuade more readers. This is why the text directly starts talking about the radio station which has published the national anthem on the radio in the new Spanish version. However, this was not received in a positive way by the United States: „…with an unprecedented and, indeed ...the United States“(ll.3). With the help of this introduction the reader gets know that the text is talking about what is considered to be an unacceptable situation.
He continues talking about other groups which also gave their own opinions "Talk shows hosts and academics…. a desecration of a national symbol. “(ll.5) Moreover he gives the opinion of senators and also of George W. Bush. With this strategy the author gains the support of many readers because he repeats the arguments and attitudes of very important persons so that the readers trust to this opinions and also get persuaded by them. He also quotes from George W. Bush "one of the important things here is, when we debate this issue, that we do not lose our national soul“and indirectly hides his own request that the population should debate and do something against the Spanish anthem.
The third part of the text starts with lots of rhetorical questions which have the function to make the readers think about the given situation. The author also uses words like "crooning“ and "outcry“ which describe the Spanish version of the anthem in a negative way. This is also a strategy of the author to distance the readers from the "Nuestro Himno“.
Moreover he makes clear that it is dangerous for the United States if such issues are accepted, because America should not become a bilingual nation. At the end of the text he indirectly requests again that the American civilization should not give up and avoid a bilingual nation: "…and America will sometime be articulating its identity in two languages...“(ll.50)

I corrected basic grammar and made it sound better in some places, but kept the original text intact. Your English is very good there weren't too many mistakes here.

Not sure how quotation marks are done in German, but in English quotations are normally marked by either " " (e.g. "quotation") or ' ' (e.g. 'quotation').